The South Will Rise Again

Predator Press

[LOBO]

I don’t need my remote control anymore.

I've found my favorite station.

Not only does truTV have some of my favorite Forensic Files-esque shows, but I’m now a monster fan of virtually anything by The Smoking Gun Presents (such as Worlds Dumbest [add plural noun here]” and “Most Shocking [add plural noun here]"). Still not enough high-speed car chases for you? TruTV also tops you off with a slew -nay, a bevy of police documentaries like "Cops": it’s a veritable symphony of automotive destruction and reckless blue steel boobery.

The fact is if you live in Mobile, Alabama, I’ve seen you blown up in a dragster, "tuned up" by cops, or being set on fire during a drinking game a half a dozen times already. (If not, please be patient ... I just discovered this channel a few weeks ago.)

But I’m simultaneously getting "numb" to it all as well, and often find myself preoccupied with the Mobilite [Mobillian?] future. Sure already-existing footage will doubtlessly leave them reigning supreme in the ratings for at least a few more months ... with luck, perhaps even into 2010. But the wonderful citizens of Mobile have really raised the bar when it comes to entertainment: how are they going to top all this?

This is no time for complacency. Mark my words: Mobile, at some point, is really going to have to ratchet it up if it wants to continue on as America’s media darling. Fame of this magnitude cannot be maintained without a great deal of hard work and carelessness, and I know for a fact Tuscaloosa and Birmingham are watching for any and every opportunity to snatch it all away.

The obvious solution –filming a cop on fire beating a drunken Mobilite in a dragster that explodes- is probably far too dangerous.

Still, nobody ever said celebrity was easy.