What if our Alien Visitors are Delicious?

Predator Press

[LOBO]

Oh, come on ... you're all thinking it, you're just too chicken to ask.

And I can already hear you bleeding heart liberals complaining, 'But LOBO, aliens capable of interstellar travel would be super-intelligent!' blah blah.

Oh please ... ridden a bus lately? What if these are celestial losers tryin to get a picture of themselves next to the intergalactic equivalent of the 'World's Biggest Ball of Yarn?"

Pthbttt!

The capability of travel doesn't impress me. In fact non-intelligent beings travel every day (see photo, right).

And frankly, these rude and unannounced tourists being 'intelligent' only makes the idea more attractive: what could be better than a meal that preheats the oven, sets the timer, lathers itself in a fine Mornay sauce and is fully cooked to a succulent golden-brown before you even get home?

As far as I'm concerned, the only question is whether to serve them with a white wine or a red.


Comments

Split the diff and go with a nice White Zinfandel.

It goes with everything and often comes in a box.
LOBO said…
Actually, aliens tend to be too gamey for White Zin: I'm goin' Boone's Farm.

-After all those cattle mutilations, Boone has an axe to grind anyways.
Dammit I almost suggested Boones Farm but I thought wine the sme color as the flesh would be confusing
Stephanie Barr said…
Note to self: Scratch Lobo off the list of prospective Mars astronauts.

I can see it now..."Yeah, there was life on Mars, beautiful little plants and some foraging beasts, but, hey, there's only so long one can eat dehydrated food. Steak and a salad called to me, what can I say? By the way, they were delicious, better though if I'd had something besides Tang to drink."
Stickman said…
Those would be some dumb ass aliens to travel all the way here to be eaten. If they get here and they are that dumb, then we can guess that their home planet took all of its retards and put them on a short bus and sent it here. And then there is probably a good chance that they poisoned them somehow so we would die from eating them. And then the smart ones would come and take over our planet. I'm not willing to take the risk. But I'll have some wine!
Suzanne said…
Dear God, stickman put a lot more thought into eating aliens than I'm willing to. But if they keep killing all our cows it's got to be for a reason, don't you think. They might be luring us into eating them, the poisoned ones I mean. I'm sure I'll sleep like a baby tonight.
LOBO said…
The Office Scribe: I'm for sure you would poop funny colors -and maybe even live littens or something.

Mmmmmm ... kittens

Stephanie B: Too late. I liberated Mars from the "Aqueduct Tax" in 1992, and they have been so happy I haven't heard from them since.

Stickman: Man I thought I was a cynic.

But I assure you the Martians are for too evolved to treat their kind with such cruelty.

Therefore they are 100% safe to eat.

Sue: Did you ever think that maybe the mutilated cows are actually space cows, and the sprawl of organs is actually natural for them in a state of lower gravity?

Hm?

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