When All Else Fails
Predator Press
[LOBO]
“I told you to stop applying for psychiatrist jobs!” says Terri, scowling into my CareerBuilder account.
“It’s not just any psychiatrist job.” I explain. “It’s Director of Psychiatry. I would run, like, a fleet of psychiatrists. Those cats make like $250,000 a year.”
“Jesus Christ.”
“How hard could it be?” I shrug. “I carry around a clipboard, and make all the patients in my asylum smoke cannabis while listening to old Beatles records. Hell people will be trying to break in.”
“You’re not qualified!”
“I get my second interview tomorrow.”
“Really?”
[LOBO]“I told you to stop applying for psychiatrist jobs!” says Terri, scowling into my CareerBuilder account.
“It’s not just any psychiatrist job.” I explain. “It’s Director of Psychiatry. I would run, like, a fleet of psychiatrists. Those cats make like $250,000 a year.”
“Jesus Christ.”
“How hard could it be?” I shrug. “I carry around a clipboard, and make all the patients in my asylum smoke cannabis while listening to old Beatles records. Hell people will be trying to break in.”
“You’re not qualified!”
“I get my second interview tomorrow.”
“Really?”
Comments
:)
I wouldn't let the lack of qualification sway you. I see unqualified "experts" all the time.
Sephanie B: Kids love me. And if they don't spot the Nyquil bottle, the 'blue milk' will have them out before the Spongebob credits roll.
Double 'L': Well I made the guy that thought he was crawling with bugs bunk with the guy that thought he was a spider, and put the obsessively germ-phobic guy in the room with the guy that likes to write in his own poo.
-Let’s just say I've already saved the asylum millions of dollars, and there’s a dumb assed intern that owes me fifty of them as well.
Stickman: You don't by chance have an irrational phobia of country fried steak, do you?
That dumb assed intern that owes me $50 wants to "let it ride."
Mom: That's what I would have thought, but these poor bastards just want to be rehabilitated and reintroduced to society.
Poor, crazy bastards. Every last one of them.
Shawn: There's already a waiting list.
-I have you penciled in behind Matthew McConaughey.
Jeff: You better remember quick -You're "Country Fried Steak" Guy!
(I'll cut you in for half)
canadianfermentation: Just show up with a labcoat and a clipboard. But not just some scubby 99 cent wooden clipboard ... pop the extra $2 and get one of those classy transparent plasic ones.