Mukasey: Torture Authority Memo 'Mistake'
Predator Press
[LOBO]
As Attorney General-designate Michael Mukasey was admitting that the now-famous document written by General Jay Bybee and endorsed by Alberto Gonzalez was a mistake, I thought, "well duh."
Wow. Memos are horrible and dangerous things.
WTG genius.
As you readers know, I already know better than to put anything really crazy in writing. So I'm suffering jetlag and airline-food indigestion only to learn once again I'm light years ahead of the government? When Ethan told me to go to Capitol Hill to cover the 'torture memo' story, I thought it would be a saucy sex scandal!
I got bored quickly. And God bless me Ethan, I even tried drafting a story about this guys' horrible tie ... but I was just powerless against the oppressive, excruciating blasé of listening to those old guys.
An irritated Secret Service guy nudged me rudely awake. Said I was snoring. I asked the guy if there was anyplace to get coffee, and he put his finger to his lips and 'shooshed' me.
No, I'm serious. The prick shooshed me!
He took a few minutes quietly explaining to me how I'm "supposed to be quiet," and "you can't get coffee during Capitol Hill proceedings," and how the porn I was browsing on my laptop was "offending the people behind me."
This guy must be just as bored as I am.
I decided to engage him in conversation. I tried to explain that the crunkly old white people here were pent up about porn because they had all the collective sexual attraction of a sardine stuffed the wrong way through a mallard. And that the secret to attracting these chicks is probably only wearing a decent magnet considering the bling on all the trophy wives in attendance.
And even as I was beaten and tased, I knew I was on my way to a Pulitzer ...
[LOBO]As Attorney General-designate Michael Mukasey was admitting that the now-famous document written by General Jay Bybee and endorsed by Alberto Gonzalez was a mistake, I thought, "well duh."
Wow. Memos are horrible and dangerous things.
WTG genius.
As you readers know, I already know better than to put anything really crazy in writing. So I'm suffering jetlag and airline-food indigestion only to learn once again I'm light years ahead of the government? When Ethan told me to go to Capitol Hill to cover the 'torture memo' story, I thought it would be a saucy sex scandal!
I got bored quickly. And God bless me Ethan, I even tried drafting a story about this guys' horrible tie ... but I was just powerless against the oppressive, excruciating blasé of listening to those old guys.
An irritated Secret Service guy nudged me rudely awake. Said I was snoring. I asked the guy if there was anyplace to get coffee, and he put his finger to his lips and 'shooshed' me.
No, I'm serious. The prick shooshed me!
He took a few minutes quietly explaining to me how I'm "supposed to be quiet," and "you can't get coffee during Capitol Hill proceedings," and how the porn I was browsing on my laptop was "offending the people behind me."
This guy must be just as bored as I am.
I decided to engage him in conversation. I tried to explain that the crunkly old white people here were pent up about porn because they had all the collective sexual attraction of a sardine stuffed the wrong way through a mallard. And that the secret to attracting these chicks is probably only wearing a decent magnet considering the bling on all the trophy wives in attendance.
And even as I was beaten and tased, I knew I was on my way to a Pulitzer ...
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