Ask LOBO: How to Blog Part III

Predator Press

[LOBO]

This installment of How to Blog is dedicated to increasing traffic by utilizing Blogger-Oriented Observations and Bold Statements.

-"BOOBS" for short.

As the primary author of Predator Press, I can’t say enough about BOOBS. Nothing attracts new readers like them, and there shouldn’t be an inch of your blog that isn’t completely devoted to them. BOOBS have forever been the life’s blood of the internet, and without them none of us would be here.

But be warned: you can’t just use any BOOBS. No matter what kind of creative savvy you command, spongy lifeless sulky BOOBS will drag your blog down into depressing obscurity. You want new and upbeat perky BOOBS. Hard BOOBS. Firm, well rounded BOOBS. –BOOBS that when called upon can slam home an exciting and informative lifestyle like a railroad spike.

And don’t get locked into specific BOOBS either: they might make your blog trite and repetitive seeming. The biggest mistake you can make is to climb up onto BOOBS you find perfect and proselytize joyously down upon your readers: while they might be hypnotized briefly by the gigantic mighty weight of your respective views, they will eventually feel alienated.

One must be open to new BOOBS occasionally. There’s nothing worse than focusing too hard on one set of BOOBS, because pow you’re likely to get blindsided by someone else’s BOOBS. You could lose an eye like that! Remember variety is good: Predator Press, for example, often features BOOBS that go in completely different directions; while this might seem self-defeating, the occasional violent collision of BOOBS is a spectacle no avid blog reader would ever want to miss out on.

And that concludes How to Blog Part III. Please put this information to good use, and stay tuned for Part IV: a riveting discourse of the next phase of good blogging, “Topical Information To Surf.”

Now go!

Blog!