Night in the Ruts

Predator Press

[LOBO]

The blindfold comes off, and I’m sitting in a small room.

Around me –left to right-- is Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh, and President George Bush.

“Word up, homie!” I says to Bush, who artfully avoids my conspicuous 'High Five'.

“LOBO,” says Newt. “We have to talk. In your first week as a Republican, you’ve enraged senior citizens, published smutty innuendoes, and insulted maybe every religion on the face of the Earth.”

I look around, and I can read it in their eyes.

I’m being kicked out.

“Look,” says Rush, puffing a stogie. “Not everyone is cut out to be a Republican. We think you should join the Democratic Party." He taps his ash, "We've already cancelled your decoder ring."