Chiefly Speaking

Predator Press

[LOBO]

George Bush Junior, clutching a fire hydrant, was begging. "Please don't do this anymore. I'll do anything!"

"George," says the guy in the Nixon mask. "Join me, and together we shall rule the galaxy."

"Shit, I'd join you if you just took me to Dennys!"

"You have no idea the power of the Dark Side."

"Look, asshole. I already said I would join you." Bush gets up, walks to the mysterious stranger's car, climbs in the passenger side and slams the door. Rolling down the electric window, he yells, "This is the maximum level of joining you."

"George," says the masked stranger. "I am your father."

Suddenly, the Nixon mask comes off, and it's George Bush Senior!

"Oh yeah Dad," says George Junior tiredly from the car. "Like that bit didn't get old the first time you did it. What was I, eight then? Huh Dad? I'm thirty-five now. I'm in college fer Chrissake. Plus I think I'm a goddamn member of Congress or something like that."

Sulkily, George Bush senior drops the mask, and shuffles for the car.

"Chop chop, there pops," says Bush Junior. "I'm trying to decide between the AARP and the military defense fund even as we speak."

George Senior shuts the door, and puts his seat belt on.

"I'm gonna have twelve Happy Burgers and fifty milkshakes!" Cries Bush Junior. "Yeah!"

"Look," mumbles Bush Senior, adjusting the bulletproof mirror. "Just don't make a scene if some kid's already done the maze on the menu again. They have thousands of those in back. We just have to ask a waitress."

"Okay Dad," Says George Junior. "But can you make this car bounce in the air like those Mexican cars do?"

Bush Senior scowls and starts the car.

"Phooey,” says George Junior, folding his arms. “I don't know what the point is of being President is if you can't have a bouncy car."

Comments

LOTGK said…
Sad but true, but very funny. Thanks for the laugh.

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