Predator Press Opens Etsy Shop!

Predator Press

[LOBO]

Millions and millions of readers are always asking me every day ”LOBO, why doesn’t an entrepreneurial genius such as yourself have an Etsy shop?”

Well truthfully it wasn’t easy to find stuff worthy of selling on Predator Press. But after scouring the house numerous times, I finally decided I could not, in good conscience, stand between our fans and these fine products:

This colossally historic sandwich has the distinction of being shunned by me personally last February, and has been sitting in my fridge ever since.

-I don’t know why someone would put icky onions all over it, but this mystery only enhances it’s intrinsic value.




The fabulous usefulness of Tupperware can never be overstated, even when the lid is slightly warped and doesn’t close anymore.

Because its history is intimately linked to the afore mentioned sandwich, I consider it part of a collection: reluctant to separate them, I’m willing to combine shipping with the purchase of both.


How I came into possession of the skull of the ill-fated Pedro Enchilada Philippe Van Peebles isn’t quite clear -but as the personal barber and dentist to Isaac Newton’s second cousin's neighbor, the estimated worth is beyond calculation.

Especially if you are Pedro Enchilada Philippe Van Peebles.

Upon request, Pedro Enchilada Philippe Van Peebles can have it at half price.


Imagine my surprise when I bumped into this timeless treasure while trying to find my mailbox.

If you're a gearhead like me, this is a bargain impossible to pass up: this tasteful classic comes complete with a door, two free windshields* and four things wheels presumably attach to.


And finally, there is the crown jewel of the sale.

-No decent fireplace mantle would be complete without my massive 8.5” by 11” hand crafted self-portrait entitled, “I Love Etsy.”**

Each of the 10,000 prints I had made at Kinko's are signed and numbered -but unlike all those other dumb artists, mine are all numbered "1."


* Some assembly required.

** Frame sold separately.