[LOBO]
After being struck by a landing space shuttle, Air Traffic Controller Dirk Elway’s life is completely transformed: sunken into a bleak and menthol fog of Nyquil and Altoids addiction, even his goldfish have run away.Similarly one of the surviving astronauts on board that very same space shuttle goes crazy, buys a box of Depends, and rides across the country –ultimately killing everyone in Twentynine Palms California with a rake.
On a hunch, Clint Eastwood –a world-renown Astronaut Whisperer- gambles that Dirk and The Astronaut’s macabre killing spree are somehow linked; armed with nothing but a 32 oz jar of Tang and a walkie-talkie Clint makes contact, culling the rogue Astronaut and reuniting him with ailing Dirk … but soon thereafter Dirk is mysteriously killed by an overdose of rake to the back of the skull.
Can Clint teach The Astronaut to laugh and love again? Will The Astronaut once again claim his coveted spot in the London Symphony Orchestra? And how can The Astonaut's lowly new job of testing 747 engines by tossing live seagulls into them let him rise once again to his once-lofty astronaut status? Only time and a ragtag group of Baptist church choir enthusiasts can tell.We here at Predator Press give The Astronaut Whisperer, like, ten big thumbs up: this is the surprisingly engaging tale of an astronaut beset by tragedy and a love for gardening, and Clint's dogged and relentless efforts to repair his broken and battered spirit.
Scheduled for release this summer, it’s an uplifting, fun and romantic little film that’s a must-see for the whole family.
7 comments:
tell me more about clints dog
No Cage, no deal. I need to hear the Peggy Sue Got Married nerd voice at least one more time.
Eh, Clint's dog was named 'Barky.' Barky loved nothing more than eating space shuttle tiles, and ultimately killed four astronaut pilots and nine people in line at a Starbucks due to a re-entry attempt botched by gravity, physics, friction, and various other punishable laws like the one about "Matter Displacement."
Barky met his demise in an accident involving having chewed on one of my slippers that happened to be filled with a solid booster fuel: he died instantly.
-Well almost instantly: first Barky's flesh melted away, and then the skeleton fell to it's knees. Then the skeleton crumbled to ash.
I don't remember much of the rest because Barky's screaming really freaked me out.
[*sniff*]
DG: I've never been working on a comment and had someone sneak up under like that before!
[*ahem* no, I wasn't scared]
Nicolas Cage has been officially kicked out of the LOBO Institute of Cool Movie Actors.
And I know you're thinking "Gee I've never heard of the LOBO Institute of Cool Movie Actors," but it's a big heavyweight Hollywood entity as verified by the LOBO Institute of Big Heavyweight Hollywood Entity Verification Foundation.
I'm all in as long as it includes the line "Killin' Gnatzies!" in it somewhere... And it has to be pronounced gnatzies, it can't be nazis, cuz otherwise... Well screw that!
I would watch the Astronaut Whisperer.
The ghost Whisperer. Not so much.
SiteInsights: I haven't liked a few of QT's latest movies. I didn't hate them exactly, but the second half of Dusk Till Dawn was really awful. A buddy of mine put it best. "Hey! I know this is great so far, but let's throw in some vampires!"
Uggh.
lotgk: Ah jeez I know. Horse whisperers, dog whisperers, ah the whisperers are drowning out the yellers and screamers.
-I just like the title, and read the imdb synopsis of "the Horse Whisperer" and ran with it ...
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