Throb

Predator Press

[LOBO]

“Are you ready to give your presentation?” asks my boss.

I have no idea how to work the PowerPoint thingy.

“My presentation,” I reply coolly.

He leans on my file cabinet. “The one I assigned you last Tuesday. On how the company is moving toward full ISO compliance.”

I also haven't the slightest clue what the ‘International Organization for Standardization' or whatever is or does.

“Sure I am,” I says.

“Care to give me some highlights?”

“Well," I says, "I figure we have to retool the whole company for it.”

“Really? Can you give me an example?”

Standing and looking around I says, “How many do you need?”

"How about just one?"

"For starters," I reply, "take for instance ... these … cubicles.”

“What about the cubicles?”

“Why hire average and large-sized people? We could fit four times as many people in here if we started hiring midgets.”

I see the temple on the left side of his head swell.

“And,” I continue, “we could stack the cubicles three-high, thusly tripling that number.”

-The right side temple pops forth, and I can clearly see the heartbeat surging through it.

“The Fire Marshall,” he replies, (thup-thup, thup-thup) “would never allow us to stack midgets in cubicles due to the lack of access to the fire escapes.”

“That’s what the tornado slides are for.”



Comments

you are wonderfully and decidedly NOT politically correct.
Unknown said…
So awesome. I want a tomato slide for the mindless dweebs where I work.
Anonymous said…
Simply...awesome.

I've had to go and Blogroll you now.
Anonymous said…
Plus, you can use some of the extra space for daycare!
Meg said…
I love picking on midgets, too. But I think they're called little people. Or dwarfs. I get confused sometimes.
Unknown said…
Now just think if you can use the same methodology as the large scale chicken farmers do. Small cramped cages piled on top of each other - it would either be a poultry farm or a Japanese call center.
Chat Blanc said…
brilliant! see, corp America needs more creative thinkers like you.
LOBO - I think you may be on something!!!

Ooops!...I meant "onTO something"...of course!

Silly me.
Alex L said…
The fire marshall. Productivity can't be stifled by something as silly as safety.
Anonymous said…
Who cares if midgets burn?
Karin Mitchell said…
Could present some plumbing issues for bathroom access. Beware the "water" slides.
Anonymous said…
You sick bastard, lol. I like.

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