Predator Press
[LOBO]
Receiving the news of Legless Jim's untimely death came as quite a shock.
Especially to Legless Jim.
"But I'm not dead," he would insist.
I took it really hard.
I couldn't even gloat.
Walking out to the Chick Magnet, my badass ride, I just sort of collapsed against the primered 1990 Plymouth Horizon. And for a long, quiet moment of serious mortal self-reflection, I writhed in the excruciating pain of tragic loss.
"But I'm not dead, dumbass!" says poor old Lifeless, Legless Jim.
His obituary was featured in the Las Vegas Times --along with the 1999 other brave heroes lost in the Russian invasion-- on page 53 of the People section.
My "WWID" license plate obscured in comet-like dust behind my car, Legless Joe incessantly badgered me the whole way to the funeral, completely wrecking my somber, agonized grief.
It's a good thing this disrespectful fuck is already dead, I thought.
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2 comments:
WWID..... Awesome !!!! I love it. I'm totally stealing that. You are the funniest person I know.
Still awaiting more porn.
Poor legless Joe can't seem to let go can he lmao must be something in the primer on the Chick Magnet that is keeping his soul from crossing over, hey I don't know just a thought heheheh
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