Shh!

Predator Press

[LOBO]

In anticipation of widespread backlash for our previous Official Statement, we here at Predator Press have prepared the following Official Statement:


It was all Diesel’s fault.


Frankly, Predator Press is sick of hiding here in the dark, fearful of ill-reasoned retaliation. Has it gotten so a regular guy can’t break into another guy’s house, hack his password, and take a bath in his Jello and Cheese Wiz without the threat of criticism anymore?

What in God’s name is this country coming to?

I, for one, am shocked and appalled. And how am I supposed to finish reading Antisocial Commentary if every time I flip on the lights some crazy blogger takes potshots at the wholesome Wisdom, Purity, Hope and Truth which Predator Press strives only to promote? (Yes, I’m talking to you Don: I looked up all those big words you told me were compliments, and you were lying!)

Well Diesel, I’m onto you too buddy: I suppose it was an “accident” you developed your brilliant blog, spent years writing that kickass book, and created Humor Blogs all for the sole purpose of luring me into a close enough orbit to have me assailed. The conspiracy is all so obvious now … how could I have not seen through it?

Well, your elaborate-yet-transparent communist plans are not only ill-fated, they are un-American. And as a national treasure, I consider it my patriotic duty to crawl away on my belly while I still have my dignity.

... But for the duration, I’ve disguised myself as .45 Caliber Headspace.


***

This post is actually a simple commemoration of leaving "Humor-Blogs".

It's been great fun and I'll probably still pimp it to some degree: it absolutely seethes with talent, and I recommend it as a "must-browse".

But as the Predator Press primary author, I’ve got far too much pride to bear watching her sink slowly in rank due to my growing neglect.

Thanks Diesel, and good luck to all.

(And don’t be a stranger!)


:)


Comments

Who turned out the lights? ;)
Anonymous said…
First you try to disguise yourself as picante sauce and now some cut-rate webrag? Where will the insanity end? Was it the Cheeze Wiz? That stuff's great, btw. Not the cheese, but the nitrous.
Simon Jester said…
I'm all about the Wiz myself.
So are you trying to say that Don Lewis is a member of the communist party or something?

I'm still plotting my revenge, you know. It will happen when you least expect it, probably between now and my WTF?! Friday Offensive. :)
Great, now I think Don is using secret communist code speak!

Is he the Grand Wiz of their cult or something?

Now I am all paranoid.
Bee said…
Okay, I wish I was smarter but I'm really confused. Are you leaving humor-blogs, blogland, Earth or did you just forget to update your calendar and think it's still April Fools day?

Enquiring (and dumb) minds want to know!
LOBO said…
Bee: Yes

:)
Anonymous said…
Good for you Lobo -- just because you're paranoid, it doesn't mean that people aren't out to get you.

m.
Bee said…
Oh. Okay, glad we cleared that up!
crpitt said…
This looks much better than .45 Caliber Headspace :)
Anonymous said…
cheeze whiz and jello..Yikes...no wonder the lights are out..:))
Brent Diggs said…
(sniffle)
LOBO said…
Sniffle!?

You jerk!

:)

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