The Bachelor's Guide to the Twenty-First Century
Predator Press
[Mr. Insanity]
I suppose I should start releasing some of these oddball drafts LOBO has left behind.
Here's one:
The Bachelor's Guide to the Twenty-First Century
Chapter 16: Doing the Dishes
1) Wake up.
2) Make coffee.
3) Go to gas station to buy coffee as there are no clean coffee cups.
4) Clear off surfaces for dirty dishes so you can empty sink.
5) Go back to store to buy dishwashing liquid, cleaning products.
6) Put dirty dishes in bathtub so there is space for the cleaning products, soak thoroughly.
7) Go back to sleep (maybe the roommate will do them now; they are half done already).
8) Wake up again.
9) Curse at lazy, smelly roommate.
10) Go to gas station to buy coffee.
11) Pick up pizza (as there are no clean dishes).
12) Clear off cleaning products so there is space for pizza.
13) Clear out bathtub so there is space for cleaning products.
14) Put dishes in front lawn, run sprinkler.
15) Belay dishes in lawn: must hose beer cans off first.
16) Stack dirty dishes on hood of car.
17) In moment of serendipity, decide to drive to the car wash.
18) Stop and buy gas, Lotto tickets.
19) Drive through car wash.
20) Flip dishes over, and drive through car wash again.
21) Curse at car wash attendant for using hot wax, skimping on 'Jet Dry'.
22) Throw dirty dishes away.
23) Go to Sears and buy new dishes.
24) Job Completed! Celebrate with nice nap.
[Mr. Insanity]
I suppose I should start releasing some of these oddball drafts LOBO has left behind.
Here's one:
The Bachelor's Guide to the Twenty-First Century
Chapter 16: Doing the Dishes
1) Wake up.
2) Make coffee.
3) Go to gas station to buy coffee as there are no clean coffee cups.
4) Clear off surfaces for dirty dishes so you can empty sink.
5) Go back to store to buy dishwashing liquid, cleaning products.
6) Put dirty dishes in bathtub so there is space for the cleaning products, soak thoroughly.
7) Go back to sleep (maybe the roommate will do them now; they are half done already).
8) Wake up again.
9) Curse at lazy, smelly roommate.
10) Go to gas station to buy coffee.
11) Pick up pizza (as there are no clean dishes).
12) Clear off cleaning products so there is space for pizza.
13) Clear out bathtub so there is space for cleaning products.
14) Put dishes in front lawn, run sprinkler.
15) Belay dishes in lawn: must hose beer cans off first.
16) Stack dirty dishes on hood of car.
17) In moment of serendipity, decide to drive to the car wash.
18) Stop and buy gas, Lotto tickets.
19) Drive through car wash.
20) Flip dishes over, and drive through car wash again.
21) Curse at car wash attendant for using hot wax, skimping on 'Jet Dry'.
22) Throw dirty dishes away.
23) Go to Sears and buy new dishes.
24) Job Completed! Celebrate with nice nap.
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