Soul
Predator Press
[LOBO]
I got some emails on "Silent Night, Holy Crap". Among my favorite comments was the one from my old philosophy teacher who wrote "I can't believe you are that morally corrupt. It is my firm belief that you, Mr. Curr, are completely devoid of any soul whatsoever."
Now, I went to that school for two and a half years. Where the heck was he then?
I guess I'm shocked that he's shocked.
***
Right around my fourth semester, I got elected Vice President of the Student Senate. And again, I parlayed the experience into earning some credits for it ... at the end of my "term" I had to produce a sixteen page essay on "What I learned in Student Government". And I'm no genius obviously; even after thirty thousand dollars of education I still can't spell. But I can plot out a pie-chart timeline in Excel of how long one million dollars would keep me in Lotto tickets and hookers until I had to go back to work, so I guess it's not a total loss.
My college wasn't really that different than any other I've heard of. You've got your usual cast of faculty like this guy: repentant bluejean hippies stuffing impressionable minds with self-indulgent liberal happity horse shit while simultaneously backing tuition increases, personal raises, free speech being limited to "free speech zones", ad nauseam.
The hypocrisy intrigued me.
One of my first proposals was for funding "Upstart": a newly-created Campus Club for anarchists, whereas I, the founding member, would reside as Chairman.
When I submitted the draft Constitution, Charter, and necessary paperwork for this new "club", the college administration absolutely freaked. We heard arguments of all kinds. This was before September 11, but still there were accusations of bomb plots and all kinds of paranoia: The Unabomber's Manifesto was still fresh in the press.
But as far as Upstart was concerned, nothing was further from the truth. The concept was that of a discussion group where people could weigh the merits [or lack thereof] of government styles as they applied to current events in an academic setting. Like a think tank of uncensored viewpoints. Uncensored viewpoints that unvaryingly found themselves generated on tropical island resorts crawling with scantily-clad women and Lotto tickets.
Swear to God the college fought me for two full years on this one. The Administration hired consultants and lawyers. They devoted hundreds --if not thousands-- of man-hours to the obstruction of my "anarchist club". Whenever the Constitution and Charter of Upstart hit the Senate floor, there were faculty, admin and various other suits everywhere. And eventually, reporters as well.
They could stall, but only for so long. If the campus was going to sponsor any clubs at all, there was ultimately no legitimate reason to oppose an "anarchist's club". Inevitably they shifted the argument to "Maybe we shouldn't sponsor any clubs at all." Now all the other clubs are backing my not-yet-ratified constitution.
Two years of this, and all the college's efforts culminated into a single distressing conclusion: they trapped themselves, and simply couldn't make a good move anymore. The harder they fought, the more press would show up. The press showing up accelerated the drama. The drama accelerated the attention. In the end, it was a circus.
We had a Senate meeting at two in the afternoon, and everyone had argued to the point of exhaustion. I was so confident of final ratification, I called the first official "Upstart" meeting to Official Order that same day at four o'clock.
I issued press releases.
Four hundred students were there, eager to take their place in academic history. Faculty and Administration also attended, sharpening their claws in wait of some hint of civil disobedience.
After calling the meeting to order, the first order of business I proposed was to revoke and dissolve "Upstart's" newly-signed Constitution and Charter. Everyone was stunned, but I'm proud to say that the vote passed by the narrow margin of 6 to 5.
In the hallway, I was stopped by an exasperated reporter with a gigantic microphone. "Mr. Curr, why did you self-destruct your own club after fighting so hard to get it acknowledged by the college?"
"Well," I replied, blinded by camera lighting "It's an anarchist club. I called a meeting and all these people showed up. It was obviously rife with treacherous conformity, and polluted with insidious ideals that would ultimately only counter the cause."
I got an "A" on my essay.
[LOBO]
I got some emails on "Silent Night, Holy Crap". Among my favorite comments was the one from my old philosophy teacher who wrote "I can't believe you are that morally corrupt. It is my firm belief that you, Mr. Curr, are completely devoid of any soul whatsoever."
Now, I went to that school for two and a half years. Where the heck was he then?
I guess I'm shocked that he's shocked.
Right around my fourth semester, I got elected Vice President of the Student Senate. And again, I parlayed the experience into earning some credits for it ... at the end of my "term" I had to produce a sixteen page essay on "What I learned in Student Government". And I'm no genius obviously; even after thirty thousand dollars of education I still can't spell. But I can plot out a pie-chart timeline in Excel of how long one million dollars would keep me in Lotto tickets and hookers until I had to go back to work, so I guess it's not a total loss.
My college wasn't really that different than any other I've heard of. You've got your usual cast of faculty like this guy: repentant bluejean hippies stuffing impressionable minds with self-indulgent liberal happity horse shit while simultaneously backing tuition increases, personal raises, free speech being limited to "free speech zones", ad nauseam.
The hypocrisy intrigued me.
One of my first proposals was for funding "Upstart": a newly-created Campus Club for anarchists, whereas I, the founding member, would reside as Chairman.
When I submitted the draft Constitution, Charter, and necessary paperwork for this new "club", the college administration absolutely freaked. We heard arguments of all kinds. This was before September 11, but still there were accusations of bomb plots and all kinds of paranoia: The Unabomber's Manifesto was still fresh in the press.
But as far as Upstart was concerned, nothing was further from the truth. The concept was that of a discussion group where people could weigh the merits [or lack thereof] of government styles as they applied to current events in an academic setting. Like a think tank of uncensored viewpoints. Uncensored viewpoints that unvaryingly found themselves generated on tropical island resorts crawling with scantily-clad women and Lotto tickets.
Swear to God the college fought me for two full years on this one. The Administration hired consultants and lawyers. They devoted hundreds --if not thousands-- of man-hours to the obstruction of my "anarchist club". Whenever the Constitution and Charter of Upstart hit the Senate floor, there were faculty, admin and various other suits everywhere. And eventually, reporters as well.
They could stall, but only for so long. If the campus was going to sponsor any clubs at all, there was ultimately no legitimate reason to oppose an "anarchist's club". Inevitably they shifted the argument to "Maybe we shouldn't sponsor any clubs at all." Now all the other clubs are backing my not-yet-ratified constitution.
Two years of this, and all the college's efforts culminated into a single distressing conclusion: they trapped themselves, and simply couldn't make a good move anymore. The harder they fought, the more press would show up. The press showing up accelerated the drama. The drama accelerated the attention. In the end, it was a circus.
We had a Senate meeting at two in the afternoon, and everyone had argued to the point of exhaustion. I was so confident of final ratification, I called the first official "Upstart" meeting to Official Order that same day at four o'clock.
I issued press releases.
Four hundred students were there, eager to take their place in academic history. Faculty and Administration also attended, sharpening their claws in wait of some hint of civil disobedience.
After calling the meeting to order, the first order of business I proposed was to revoke and dissolve "Upstart's" newly-signed Constitution and Charter. Everyone was stunned, but I'm proud to say that the vote passed by the narrow margin of 6 to 5.
In the hallway, I was stopped by an exasperated reporter with a gigantic microphone. "Mr. Curr, why did you self-destruct your own club after fighting so hard to get it acknowledged by the college?"
"Well," I replied, blinded by camera lighting "It's an anarchist club. I called a meeting and all these people showed up. It was obviously rife with treacherous conformity, and polluted with insidious ideals that would ultimately only counter the cause."
I got an "A" on my essay.
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